How Couples Therapy Can Help You

Many men and women feel scared to start couples counseling. The root of this fear is often in the assumption that “I will be blamed for all the problems in our relationships”. Or, even worse, my partner and therapist together will unite against me. Fears like this keep couples from taking actions. John Gottman’s research found that in the United States couples spend on average of 6 years being unhappy before they reach out for professional help. 6 years of life!! On top of that, after waiting 6 years it is often too late and relationships are getting destroyed.

So what is couples therapy really about? The first thing you need to know is that in couples therapy, the relationship itself is the client. The therapist does not take sides because if “one side wins” it also means the relationship loses. We know that each partner has serious reasons for their behaviors, even if the behavior is distractive.

What happens in therapy after that – we start talking about the reasons that hide behind destructive behaviors, and then feelings emerge. We are not talking about secondary feelings, such as anger, irritation, or jealousy. Here we are talking about the real feelings behind feelings – hurt, sadness, and fear – the vulnerable ones. As we begin to address the real feelings, couples develop a deeper understanding of each other’s needs. Partners find out that they can allow themselves to be vulnerable, and it is safe to do so. This is where deep understanding, acceptance, and change occurs. This acceptance and understanding we sometimes call love.

Contact us today to schedule your session. Don’t let yourself wait 6 years!

With love,

Aly Landry, MS, NCC

Registered Marriage and Family Therapist Intern

Registered Mental Health Counselor Intern

National Certified Counselor

(321) 209 2049

Speak Your Mind


1059 Maitland Center Commons Boulevard Suite 200
Maitland, FL 32751


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